Cue Card

Describe a disagreement you had with someone

You should say:

• who you disagreed with
• what the disagreement was about
• what the outcome was; and
• explain how you felt about the disagreement.

Sample Part 3 Questions

1. What do you do if you disagree with someone?
2. What can be done to stop an argument escalating into a fight?
3. Why do some people avoid conflict and why is it not always a good thing?
4. What kinds of disagreements do parents and children often have?
5. Why do some people avoid conflict and why is it not always a good thing?
6. What are some ways to show people respect during a disagreement?

Sample Cue Card Answer

I was at a music festival with my friend Alex, and we were both super stoked to see our favorite band perform. But as we were waiting for them to come on stage, we got into a heated argument about the best way to experience live music. Alex was adamant that the best spot was right up front, where you could see the sweat dripping from the lead singer's face. But I was convinced that the sound quality was way better towards the back, where you could actually hear the instruments clearly.

We went back and forth, each of us trying to convince the other that our way was the only way. But the more we argued, the more ridiculous it got. We started bringing up ridiculous examples - like how the mosh pit was a war zone, or how the sound engineer was a genius who could make the music sound amazing from any spot in the venue. It was getting pretty heated, and we were both getting frustrated.

But then something shifted. Alex pointed out that we were both right - the front row was intense and immersive, but the sound quality did suffer. And I realized that I was so focused on being 'right' that I wasn't listening to Alex's perspective. We both took a deep breath, and suddenly we were laughing and joking about how silly our argument was. We found a spot in the middle of the crowd, where we could see and hear the band pretty well, and we enjoyed the rest of the show together.

Looking back, I realize that our disagreement was never really about the music festival - it was about being heard and understood. We both wanted to feel like our opinions mattered, and we got caught up in trying to 'win' the argument. But in the end, it was the opposite - by listening to each other and finding common ground, we had a way better time.

Cue Card Answer Key Phrases and Idioms

get heated

to become more intense or angry

The argument got heated when they started yelling at each other.

The debate got heated when the candidates started attacking each other's policies.

take a deep breath

to calm down and relax

She took a deep breath before giving her presentation.

He took a deep breath and tried to calm down after the argument.

Sample Part 3 Answers

What do you do if you disagree with someone? When I disagree with someone, I try to take a step back and understand where they're coming from. I think it's really important to listen actively and not just hear the words, but also the emotions behind them. Sometimes, people get defensive or emotional when they're disagreeing with someone, and it's easy to get caught up in that. But if I take a deep breath and really listen to what the other person is saying, I can usually find some common ground. I might say something like, 'I understand why you think that, but I have a different perspective on this.' By acknowledging their point of view, I can show that I respect their opinion, even if I don't agree with it.

What can be done to stop an argument escalating into a fight? One thing that can really help prevent an argument from escalating is to avoid taking things personally. When someone attacks or criticizes our ideas or opinions, it's natural to feel defensive. But if we can separate our self-worth from the issue at hand, we can respond more calmly and rationally. I've found that it helps to focus on the specific issue, rather than making general attacks or criticisms. For example, instead of saying 'You always do this,' I might say 'I feel frustrated when this happens.' By using 'I' statements and focusing on the specific issue, we can avoid blaming or attacking the other person, and find a way to resolve the issue without things getting out of hand.

Why do some people avoid conflict and why is it not always a good thing? Some people avoid conflict because they're afraid of confrontation or don't want to rock the boat. But avoiding conflict altogether can actually be damaging in the long run. When we avoid conflict, we might be avoiding important issues that need to be addressed. For example, if a friend is consistently late to meetups, it's better to address the issue directly rather than just avoiding the friend altogether. By avoiding conflict, we might be missing out on the opportunity to resolve the issue and strengthen our relationship in the long run. Instead of avoiding conflict, it's better to learn how to navigate it in a healthy way, by listening actively, staying calm, and focusing on finding a resolution.

What kinds of disagreements do parents and children often have? Parents and children often have disagreements about boundaries and rules. As a child grows older, they naturally want more independence and autonomy, while parents want to ensure their safety and well-being. This can lead to conflicts over things like curfews, chores, and screen time. For example, a teenager might feel like their parents are being too controlling, while the parents might feel like the teenager is being irresponsible. These kinds of disagreements can be tough to navigate, but it's essential to find a balance between giving the child independence and setting clear boundaries.

Why do some people avoid conflict and why is it not always a good thing? Some people avoid conflict because they're afraid of confrontation or don't want to rock the boat. But avoiding conflict altogether can actually be damaging in the long run. When we avoid conflict, we might be avoiding important issues that need to be addressed. For example, if a friend is consistently late to meetups, it's better to address the issue directly rather than just avoiding the friend altogether. By avoiding conflict, we might be missing out on the opportunity to resolve the issue and strengthen our relationship in the long run. Instead of avoiding conflict, it's better to learn how to navigate it in a healthy way, by listening actively, staying calm, and focusing on finding a resolution.

What are some ways to show people respect during a disagreement? One way to show respect during a disagreement is to maintain eye contact and use open body language. This shows that we're engaged and interested in the conversation, even if we don't agree. Another way is to use respectful language and tone. Avoid using aggressive or condescending language, and try to focus on the issue at hand rather than making personal attacks. We can also show respect by actively listening to the other person's perspective, and acknowledging their point of view. By doing so, we can create a safe and respectful space for discussion, even in the midst of disagreement.

Part 3 Key Phrases and Idioms

Take a step back

To give yourself time to think and calm down before reacting to a situation

When I disagree with someone, I try to take a step back and understand where they're coming from.

Get caught up

To become involved or trapped in a situation, often in a way that is difficult to control

Sometimes, people get defensive or emotional when they're disagreeing with someone, and it's easy to get caught up in that.

Take things personally

To feel that a criticism or comment is directed at you as a person, rather than at your actions or ideas

One thing that can really help prevent an argument from escalating is to avoid taking things personally.

Focus on the specific issue

To concentrate on the particular problem or topic being discussed, rather than bringing up other unrelated issues

I've found that it helps to focus on the specific issue, rather than making general attacks or criticisms.

Rock the boat

To cause trouble or disturb a situation that is currently calm and stable

Some people avoid conflict because they're afraid of confrontation or don't want to rock the boat.

Miss out

To fail to experience or benefit from something because of a particular action or decision

By avoiding conflict, we might be missing out on the opportunity to resolve the issue and strengthen our relationship in the long run.

Maintain eye contact

To look directly at someone while speaking or listening to them

One way to show respect during a disagreement is to maintain eye contact and use open body language.

Open body language

A relaxed and welcoming posture, such as uncrossing your arms or standing up straight

One way to show respect during a disagreement is to maintain eye contact and use open body language.